A cop chased a military convoy by mistake and nearly got shot.
I was here at work looking through some posts during lunch and noticed the thread about cops. It got me remembering one of my own, but since it happened in a military environment I thought I would start a new thread slightly more focused in that regard.
#1 Sometimes the best stories are true stores
#2 A lot of times things happen in the military that are .... covered up for lack of a better word or just not reported
#3 I am vague about some things which are not important to the story at all (not exactly sure of some specifics being still "classified"
I was in a unit quite a while back that worked with NEACP in part. The plane was designed to always be airborne and be able to take over command and control during WW3 or other emergency situations. My unit was a mobile command and control unit basically. We were divided into 2 parts. Us: the guys getting the equipment and communications moved and setup, and the battle staff. The latter were a bunch of officers we really never worked with on a daily basis but went out on deployment with during exercises etc.,.
Well.. one day the unit was deployed in an exercise. This means that all the semi trucks and communications vans rolled out to a secret location we did not know about until already out on the road. The battle staff in this instance did not accompany us as it was just the deployment exercise: Go out, set up comms, tents, whatever.. send some test messages and pack up and go home. The second half of the exercise was the involvement of the MP department on base. All they are told is that X number of MP's are required to accompany us and provide security for the equipment and personnel. They are told that the equipment was TS/SCI (a rather high level of security) which means lethal force is authorized and how long the exercise should last as far as I know. In this case they had I believe about 5 Humvees with about 3-4 cops in each vehicle (one in front, one tailing the convoy, and the others dispersed throughout the rest of the convoy). The colonel was in his sedan following the last semi.
So.. the convoy leaves the base and heads out down the road (about a dozen rigs all with an orange/red light on top). Well.. the convoy comes across a truck weigh station and keeps going... like it is supposed to. However, at this particular weigh station there is a highway patrolman sitting there. He notices us bypass the weigh station and for some reason gets it in his head that we were supposed to stop. So, he hits his lights and begins chasing the convoy. This is what happens from the Colonel's point of view as he told us what exactly happened later since the rest of the unit could only hear over the radio bits and pieces.
One of the MP's reported over the radio that a cop was chasing the convoy with his lights going and wanted to know what to do. The Colonel said to just ignore him... maybe he would go away after a bit. After about 3-5 minutes, the MP reported over the radio that he was still back there. The Colonel said he finally decided: OK pull the convoy over so we can talk to this guy. So.. the entire convoy slowly pulled over onto the shoulder. Once it stopped, all the MP's got out of their vehicles and set up a perimeter on the side of the highway as best they could.
Now.. the MP in charge of the detail was a short woman that the Colonel thought was all of 5'4'' She carried an M16 with a 203 grenade launcher that looked to be as big as she was, and she was in the tail Humvee. When the cop stopped his car, he got out and quickly walked up to the rear semi and he was apparently rather pissed off saying things like "You know you passed right through a weigh station.. what the hell are you doing?" "I have been chasing you for miles" Then he walked up to the door of the back semi and grabbed the lock on it and gave it a tug saying "I need to see whats in here" and kept on trying to pull the lock off. Well.. that apparently did not sit well with the MP and she slapped the side of her weapon (which either removes the safety or something.. I was Air Force, so someone more familiar with the gun can explain in more detail) and immediately brought the weapon to aim it at the cop's head. The Colonel was still inside his sedan which was about 3 feet behind what was happening outside and the Colonel said he had never met this girl before so had no idea what was about to happen. He said all he could think of was to put his fingers in his ears, and it was that particular moment that the cop looked into the sedan and saw him with his fingers in his hears. The Colonel said the cop turned a bit white and made a bee line straight for his vehicle, got in, left and nobody heard from the cops again.
Last edited by Apostolos; 10-28-2014 at 08:27 PM.
A cop chased a military convoy by mistake and nearly got shot.
tldr; Marines are fucking retarded and shit on the floor instead of in bags, despite pictorial guides in English demonstrating how to not shit on the floor.
We took over an abandoned town center in Helmand. The unit that occupied it previously burnt their shit -- we decided to make the shift to wag bags since burning feces is a waste of manpower. Wag bags are exactly what you would expect -- you poop into one bag, then drop a little packet of decomposibles in it, then put it in a larger ziploc bag. They're more sanitary than any other method, including flush toilets. Yay wag bags.
Anyway -- we were having a devil of a time teaching the ANA (Afghan National Army) how to use these things. At least every other day some culprit would just straight shit on the floor of the shitter (think big wood box with a ledge to rest your ass on and a toilet seat to mount the bag to). We went so far as to make awesome step-by-step guides demonstrating the method. These guides were in Pashto and English WITH picture demonstrations, laminated and stapled at eye-level to all the doors. Still not good enough. So we establish a shitter watch -- 1 hour post 24/7. The job is to stand there and inspect every stall.
Shortly after establishing the watch, we get a helo full of combat replacments. One of them, on his first day in Musa Qalah, shits all over the shitter... then, gets upset when hes told to clean it out, and is heard badmouthing his NCO about "how fucked up this is." Dood had a bad deployment.
Turns out, it wasn't the Afghanis after all. It was us.
Last edited by Eidal; 10-30-2014 at 06:20 PM.
Female wins dick contest story good. Poop story bad.
Being in aircraft maintenance I don't really have any funny stories, only really cool stuff I ever saw was live or very recently taken videos of people/vehicles getting blasted by a 500 pound JDAM
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